Monday, March 31, 2014

Do you want to see some bad programming? Here comes Ride to Hell Retribution (Game Grumps)

Do you want to see some bad programming? Here comes Ride to Hell Retribution
Ride to Hell is notorious for its bad bugs and shitty game controls. However, the Game Grumps pointed out a lazy flaw in one section of the game. Just head to 8:11 and watch the barkeep lady and look to the right of the screen.
Naomi has a twin on the right of her in the cut scenes! They placed an in-game model Naomi in the same cut scene as the detailed cut scene model. And, they had the second Naomi standing in character demo pose as well. I mean how lazy is that?
The best part is that they kept the in-game Naomi in the “sex scene” in the background too! I'm sure someone pointed it out in the dev room, but someone just said, “F' it. No one will notice the two models.”
Trust me I have more to say about this shitty game, but I wanted to point this out. 
There are two of them.
 

Friday, March 28, 2014

Steven Seagal stands by Putin.

Steven Seagal, what are you doing?
Steven, we know your hair isn't that black.  Knock it off.  
From The Guardian, (( Action hero Steven Seagal, who considers Putin a personal friend, has labelled the former KGB lieutenant colonel "one of the greatest world leaders" and declared his actions in the Russian-majority Ukrainian province "very reasonable". ))
I can understand that Seagal wanting to stand up for his “friend”, but this might be the time to side step the issues given the flared tempers with the Crimea standoff. Seagal is one of those guys that doesn't understand the complexities of the Crimea issue and makes a stupid statement like this. By the way, I wouldn't call Steve an “action star” because he hasn't been in many mainstream movies recently.
The best part of the story is this portion. From the Guardian, ((The actor, who recently helped Russia's government relaunch a nationwide fitness programme which had been dormant since the Soviet era, said he considered the president as "a brother". ))
Uh, Steven Segal started the nationwide fitness program? Have you seen this guy of late? He's pretty big today, so much so that he can't do the same moves he did back in his early movie days.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

You are not the father...and you have no baby.

You are not the father...and you have no baby.
I am reading that this actually happen in Quebec not Toronto.
Yes, this guy supposedly had his girlfriend lie to him about having 5 babies.
What really pissed me off is this part. From Huffington Post, ((The Toronto Sun reports that Paul Servat was expecting his girlfriend to deliver quintuplets. Her stomach swelled, she began lactating and donations from neighbors and friends of the Saint-Jean-sur-Richelieu couple poured in. ))
Yes, people gave gifts. There was even a facebook page asking for donations. I guess everyone wants a piece of the action.
It turned out to be hoax. She even took this scam as far as into hospital! From the Toronto Sun.com, ((On Wednesday, Servat took Bienvenue to a hospital where staff told him they had no file for the pregnancy. A nurse finally took Servat aside to show him the results of blood tests. ))
You can also thrown in morning sickness and lactating? 
  How is this possible? How did she get her stomach that big?
I also fascinated with the fact that people will take a scam or lie so far and long. 
 

Hercules trailer: The second movie...

Hercules trailer: The second movie...
Some people in Hollywood thought, We need more Hercules movies. How about two of them in the same damn year?
While this version does have a better cast The Rock and Ian McShane , it still looks kind of bad. Here's hoping they really upgrade the CGI because it looks a little 2005-ish. It should also be noted that director-hack Brett Ratner is leading up this version. That can be a good or a bad thing depending on how cheesy they go with it. 
Because the other Hercules movie was viewed in such a bad light, it might harm this movie as well even if this is a better movie.   I mean people really hated the other one. 
I know some people are upset with the fact The Rock is playing the otherwise white Greek character, but I don't have a problem with it. And, I am not sure this movie will light up the box office. 
 Did I mention there is going to be another Steve Jobs movie? 

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Random Stuff

 Random Stuff
~Bioshock Infinite Burial At Sea Episode 2: So, it looks like Episode 2 is out on PC and I've been watching the Let's Play. I love the fact that we get to see the game through Elizabeth’s eyes. I already know I am going to know that I am going to miss this series. Also, the “flashback” at the beginning clearly shows that this DLC is set in the same Rapture as the first two games. It is a real shame we won't get another era to play Bioshock in...like the 70s or 80s.
~The Spice Girls and Backstreet Boys Tour? What is this the 90s all over again? Anyway, there is talk of a tour with the two groups performing around the world. I'm down.  given the state of pop music today, this is huge improvement over today's bland shit.  I am sure it would make a lot of money, but keep in mind not all the Spice Girls get along with each other and Victoria Beckham will probably not be a part of the group. Victoria is my least favorite Spice Girl. Long live Baby Spice!  Plus, this story gives me a reason to post pictures of Baby Spice. 




~P-Diddy is now Puff Daddy again. I need a score card to keep up with all the changes. He was Puff Daddy, Sean Combs, P-Diddy, Diddy, Father Puff Daddy, and so on. Next, he'll just change his name to a symbol just like Prince. I know he's full of himself, part of me feels he's just taking the piss out of his own ego by changing his name all the time. So, does that mean those TW Cable ads have to be changed?   Welcome back, Puffy Daddy.  

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Kevin Bacon returns to Footloose

Damn You, Kevin Bacon, that was very entertaining
First off, I'd like to think NBC actually does have decrees written on old scrolls.
Second, Kevin Bacon is in good shape. He's still got it.
The bit is funnier when know the back story behind this bit. For many years, Kevin Bacon has tried to distance himself from Footloose. Whenever he sees a DJ, he slips the DJ 20 fins to “not” play Footloose. Turns out, this is true. It is good to see him give up fighting the pop cultural connection and take it all in...William Shatner style.
Come on, Kevin you've had some great years.
-You had a role in JFK: By the way, you almost always fall back to JFK when playing the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. JFK is chalk full of movie stars connected to Bacon.
-You were killed by the main enemy of the X-Men.
-He has an entire mathematical equation dedicated to him with the Six Degrees game. I am not making this up!
Here he is talking about the disconnection with the movie on Conan.
To take his side, I really hate the song.  Being forced to listen to that might just be my own private hell and his too.  However, sometimes you have to "give it up" for old school pop culture.  
By the way, you would have never seen this on Leno's version of the show.  
Side Note:  I just used a clip from Conan to reference a Tonight Show bit.  Now, that's strange.  

Friday, March 21, 2014

Sam Jackson's I'm not Laurence Fishburne T-Shirt

Sam Jackson's I'm not Laurence Fishburne T-Shirt
I love the fact Samuel Jackson is going around wearing this t-shirt reminding people his isn't Laurence. There was that awkward moment between him and that annoying news guy.  There should have been a "Oh, Hell No" on the back.

I am still waiting on that Samuel Jackson Ale.

Jem and the Holograms: The Movie?(Outrageous)

Jem and the Holograms: The Movie?(Outrageous)
Yep, they're actually going through with it. Hey, GI Joe, TMNT, My Little Pony and Transformers have gotten updated remakes. Why not another toyline? I am just not sure a lot of people look back at Jem with the same nostalgia as TF or TMNT or that pony show.  However, there does seem to be a strong fangirl group online.  
From the Hollywood Reporter, ((Jason Blum’s Blumhouse Productions, Scooter Braun Productions and director Jon M. Chu are teaming up to make the movie, which has been fast-tracked to start production this spring. ))
I can't say I'm angry about the news. I was never a huge fan of the show.  I'm Care Bears all the way, sons of bitches. 
I am not sure there is a big enough fan base like say the Care Bears or My Little Pony. Both of these franchises were focused on girls and came out of the 80s. And, they both were more popular than Jem. Do I think girls need a hero to look up to? Given that we make singers out to be larger than life anyway, I think a Jem movie isn't too out of line.  They are going to have to really (Truly Truly) revamp the style and music for the movie, but keep the same magical premise. 
 
By the way, they set the Jem cartoon in the same shared universe TF and GI Joe. I am not making this up.
Yes, I did watch the show from time to time. So, I know the show. 
Screw Jem casting, I want to know about the casting of The Misfits.  

Thursday, March 20, 2014

My Little Pony Backpack...My little banned (Grayson Bruce)

My Little Pony Backpack...banned
First off, I was a little “put off” by the Pony backpack thing. However, I put it in the context of my childhood time period. Kids would have probably teased me if I brought in a Star Trek lunchbox or backpack. From that point of view, I say let your freak flag fly if you want to be a Brony. 
I personally thought only grown nerds liked the new Pony cartoon show. I guess younger boys are into the show...for different reasons than the grown men. Like whatever you want to like. No one has the right to take away your fanboy-ism...even when I can't seem to get a grip on the fans. The physical bullying and verbal is just wrong.
This kid got picked on for his backpack. As you've read my older posts, I hate bullying. (But, I also think you should also defend yourself as well. You might take a loss, but you make it harder for them to pick on you too. For every time you pick on me, I going make you fight for it.) Why even waste the time and effect pick on some kid for wearing a Pony backpack/lunchbox? You would think adults would be more sensitive to bullying, not online bullying, but actual physical bullying.
Here's the best part. Instead of punishing the bullies, they told this Grayson kid to not wear his backpack. What kind of twisted bullshit is this? So, if the kid started fighting back, would he get punished?
From the Blaze, ((When the bullying came to a head and Noreen Bruce got involved, she said school officials blamed Grayson’s open appreciation for “My Little Pony” rather than punishing the bullies. ))
What kind of Guy-Bro mindset is this? This just seems like a strange way of “dealing with the problem”. How do we stop this forest fire from spreading? Let's blow up the rest of the forest so that way the fire doesn't have anything to burn. (How did it get burned?  Tell me!)
As I've stated before, I find physical (face to face) bullying to be more troubling than a bunch of d-bags on the Internet calling me names. This stuff can stay with you when someone is actually punching you in the face and calling you names.  And, yet this is way they handle it.  Don't destroy a kid's time to play with the toys he wants to play with and watch the cartoons he wants to watch.  
To quote a Ferengi
Ugly, very ugly 
Yes, I just pulled a Trek reference from a 20+ year show. 
 

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Fox, and the penis picture...

Fox, and the penis picture...
Because I won't post full nudes on this blog, I won't embed the video. However, I will lead you to the link with a full NSFW warning. I'm not sure how you have a pic of Edward Scissorhands with a profile picture of a johnson in the same folder. That is a lot of range.  Take it from me, you keep your porn pics in a different folder than your normal pictures. 
 Didn't someone check the post before they went on air?
Here's the news' apology via mediabistro.com, ((“While reporting breaking news about the crash of the KOMO-TV helicopter in Seattle, Fox 31 Denver accidentally broadcast an offensive photo while scrolling live through a Twitter feed of pictures from the crash scene. The photo was mistakenly broadcast by our control room. It did not come from the tablet many viewers saw being used by one of our anchors. We apologize for the inadvertent broadcast of the image and we are taking immediate steps to prevent such an accident from happening again. ” ))

Yes, Fox is trying to remove all videos of the incident, but there are a few still around.
By the way, I love the quick reactions from the women and that one guy to the left.  
  

Guess who is looking for Flight 370? Courtney Love...

 Guess who is looking for Flight 370? Courtney Love...
No one asked for her help, but the messed up “singer” has decided to add her two cents to the mystery.  Since when has she decided to become a "True Detective"?   
From People.com ((Love told New York Magazine she found the suspicious area herself. "Yeah I went to the satellite site and just uploaded tons and tons of pictures. I really doubt aliens took it. It's got to be somewhere. I'm a little obsessive," she explained.  ))
I am 100% aliens took you, Courtney. I love how all the kooky people are ready starting to come out of the woodwork.  Courtney might be the queen of the kooks.  
We really don't need your help, Courtney. Let the people that know what they're doing do their job. You can go back to alienating your daughter and pissing off Madonna.

I find it amusing that this has been the only news on Courtney Love in some time. Clearly she was looking for some attention.  Remember when she was considered a talented actress?  

  

Monday, March 17, 2014

He trips. He scores (Paul Cicala)

That was an amazing tumble there, Paul Cicala. Wait for it...
I love that he started to fall and did a roll into the fall. I also like that the producer cuts off the feed before Paul comes to a rest on the pavement. And, he's made a joke about his “trip” too. Was this after the video went viral?
BTW, you never run in dress shoes...never. Take it from me.

Sunday, March 16, 2014

Unearthed: The Trail of Ibn Battuta

Unearthed: The Trail of Ibn Battuta
Holy Crap this game looks and plays bad. Hey, let's call this game Unearthed so we can remind people of Uncharted.  I'm all for an Arabic game created by an Arabic company, which this is comprised of, but this probably isn't the best title to come out of that region.  
-The grunts sound like he's taking a poop. 
-Why did they add the fighting game mini game into the game?  
-The character models are very early PS2-like .
-Ibn means “son of” from Arabic.
-Why does the main character walk so slow?
- “You are the one who always enjoyed raiding tombs and uncharting mysteries in video games.” This statement is clearly a shout-out to Tomb Raider and Uncharted. However, how does one “unchart” a mystery? Really, how do you unchart?
To be fair, the people behind the game have stated that episode 2 will be better.
Here are some reviews ripping apart the game. These are funny.

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Whassup? ads

Whassup?
Holy crap, do you remember these commercials? While I find them a bit annoying now, there is no denying that they were popular back in the day. You couldn't go anywhere without some dumb-ass in numbered shirt saying this thing out loud. In hind sight, the ads aren't as bad as the current Geico ads.
You can age the your movie or show by shoving this What's Up into your script. I also remember the parody of this ad in Scary Movie. 
  Doing research for this, I found out this came from a short film, which turned into this pop cultural artifact. They also did a Obama supported version years later. Sadly, Adam Sandler would bring back the phrase in his movie That's My Boy. Damn you, Sandler!!!
It is interesting to see how much it hasn't aged well. However, this was around the time when Budweiser and Bud Light keep bringing out a string of entertaining ads, which carried over to each other.

Friday, March 14, 2014

Random Stuff

Random Stuff
~Chris Brown can't get a break: He's been arrested again. This time, he didn't beat anyone up or bite them. He was just arrested for a probation violation. He was actually heading into rehab as the police showed up. He didn't fulfill his part of the deal. I shed no tears for him, but I still am upset with Rih being willing to get back with him numerous times.
~Lady Gaga and vomit: When you hear her music, I sometime want to puke. Just when we thought we'd stop seeing her in the press for stupid stunts, we get another talentless stunt. I hate the fact she is wasting her musical talents on shitty songs, because she can actually sing. She lowers her standards to fit a marketing model. I tried watching video from SXSW with her, but couldn't get through it.
~Listening to the original Jerry Goldsmith Total Recall soundtrack. 
This score really does hold up. I love the use of the syncopated beat as part of the main theme. I think Goldsmith was influenced by his use of beats as themes from Planet of the Apes. I've also been listening to Goldsmith's Executive Decision score too.

~I had a bit of health scare with a family member:  I won't get into details, but I found my mother unresponsive and I ended up calling 911 and saving her life.  As I stood in the ER section, a nurse praised me for saving her life.  I really don't feel like much of a hero, but okay.  I was calm and collected, despite the fact I could have lost the only person that kept me from going off the dark end of things during my development years.  She was the only one that kept my spirits up during some depressing times in high school.  Anyway, she's okay and out and about the next day. 

Bad Johnson Trailer


Bad Johnson Trailer
What in the hell?  Someone actually came up with this concept and put it to film.  So, a man’s penis leaves his body and becomes a human being.  The penis then goes around having sex with women and causing mayhem.  I guess that's what penises would do if they became human.
Yes, this movie is real.  It is like a concept a group of drunk guys would come up with and then made it happen.  
Yes, I played the penis in the film Bad Johnson.
 You know what?  I actually am interested in seeing it...sort of.
What type of conversations would I have with my little Semaj?  “Dude, you ain’t getting no play, player.  What is this a solo act?” 
Now, is there a female version of this movie? 

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Facts of Life Season one intro and other thoughts

Facts of Life Season one intro
)
I was listening to a podcast where they were talking about the Facts of Life. They mentioned that the first season had an annoying intro sung by Mrs. Garrett. I found it on YouTube and it is pretty grading on the ears.
The intro also shows the different format the show was in the first season compared to the later seasons. It was a bigger show with more characters and it seemed more focused on the school aspects than the characters. Molly Ringwald was one of the girls on the first season until she was written out.

People often forget that this was a spin-off of Different Strokes. Garrett, who was the maid on Strokes, ended up as the housemother. Kimberly from Strokes went to the same school.  And, I half wonder if you was supposed to make appearances on the show.  I always thought of the relationship between the two shows as being similar to the one between The Cosby Show and A Different World, where the original concept changed and moved away from its parent show.  
I remember not being a fan of the show in later seasons once Garrett left.  
Here's their reunion back in 2011...

Chelsea Handler snipes at Piers Morgan

Chelsea Handler snipes at Piers Morgan
)
She doesn't like Mr. Morgan and she doesn't back down either. I am not a huge fan of either one, but she does seem to have point. And, I've loved her attacks against Palin. Was it a low blow to attack his out of work status?
And, I think Chelsea has point in that he was more busy tweeting than talking to the guest. I just think she could have handled it in a better manner. His snipe back didn't help matters, and she seemed to roll over it. I think it is a bit refreshing to see some honest attacks between two people.

If CNN takes it down, here it is at CNN.com

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Random Things

Random Things
~Lena Dunham to leave acting: I can see why she wants to leave acting, but you're the lead on a damn show. I've tried to really see this woman's side of things. Heck, I support Planned Parenthood just like she does. People say how important Girls is to social structure. And, I've even sided with her with some people from Jezebel tried to diss her, but she's kind of gotten on my nerves. I've even tried again to watch two more episodes of Girls only to come away hating the character even more. There's just some people that get under my skin, and she's one of them.
~Hodor is gay: Well, the actor at least. I am down with that. Now, does he say, “Hodor”, even off the set? Given the terrible of gay rights around the world, perhaps it is a good thing for him to come out. Hodor.
On my mark, unleash heaven. 
~Noah the movie: Things are getting very testy between the director Darren Aronofsky and the vocal Christian audiences. It is at this point that he wants to completely distance himself from the Christian crowd. That seems strange given most non-believers, such as myself, have no interest in seeing a movie about a guy on a boat with animal. There was already a movie about this concept and it failed huge. It was called Evan Almighty . The other problem is Paramount wants bend over backwards to get a version of the movie that is friendly to Christians, but Darren wants his version instead. I wouldn't have even bothered making a biblical movie anyway because there is too much shit to deal with.  For true lulz, check out what Paramount did to cater to religious groups in one screening.  Holy montages, Batman.
~Obama and Zach Galifianakis: I love this video and shows that Obama has some humor. I love jabs he gives toward the Hangover. Obama comes in to plug something!

Sunday, March 09, 2014

Kickstarter-Firestarter: Guy burns his own books...for his fans.

Guy burns his own books...for his fans.
I think crowd-funding is a good idea, if used with moderation, but sometimes it comes back to bite you in the ass. And, sometimes it used for washed up actors and reality stars for no good reason. However, there have been some success stories. Now, there is a story floating around about a dude that created a book with funding on Kickstarter and he's cause a bit of an uproar. And, the story gets even stranger from there.
From dnainfo.com, ((A 30-year-old webcomics artist who raised more than $50,000 on Kickstarter has burned the books his donors paid for because, he says, he ran out of money to ship them. ))
That's right, John Campbell destroyed the books that were crowd-funded and showed the book burning video online. The man almost raised 52K on a kickstarter that was asking for only 8K. His loyal fans really wanted to see this book published. He got into trouble when he supposedly didn't have the money to ship all of the books to his backers. So, he did what any insane person would do, he burned the books and told them he wasn't going to give the a refund.
Here's the ramblings of a madman via Bleeding Cool, ((I refunded some of the preorders I received through paypal in addition to the kickstarter orders, but I will not be refunding any more. ))
Uh, people paid you money in good faith in order for you to send them their books. I got to say you have some balls telling them they won't get a refund...big balls. You didn't hold up your end of the bargain. Let's read on with this poop storm.
((The backers who gave me the most money received the least “reward” from me. After shipping costs, I “lost money” on most of the books I sold at the $25 level so, backers at the higher levels, you could perceive of yourselves as having “paid for” the books that the “lower” backers currently have, and you could try to get those books that you “paid for” somehow. ))
Wait, the more you paid into the crowd-funded least you receive? What kind of BS is that? The more you put in means you should most certainly get your books. Actually, everyone should be getting their books. What kind of hipster logic is this?
((You could try to obtain refunds through kickstarter or paypal, through your bank or credit card company. You could try to harass me or inconvenience me or tell other people negative things about me or this kickstarter in the hope that this will affect me negatively. Be aware that each attempt to contact me about this book will individually result in the burning of a book until the books are gone. ))
You're being a complete tool by threatening people into shutting up and “not inconveniencing” you. They paid for the product demand that you provide said product. That's like me going to store and buying a PS3 and having the store burn it right in front of me. One clerk saying, “No refunds and no PS3. Sucker.” You're taking a dump of the notion of crowd-funding.
Oh, it gets crazier. ((I want direct funding for my living necessities. I want to establish relationships with a group of people who can pay for my baseline needs like food and rent. I am looking for people who do not feel they need to see any “return” on their “investment.” I am looking for people who understand that money is a bad joke we use to hurt each other. ))
That's not what crowd-funding was set up for. If you want literally a handout go to the park with a can and ask for change. The whole point of funding the project is to see a “return on the investment” and to cut out the bigger gatekeepers. To ask for money after being this shit, it takes even bigger balls.
Don't preached the evils of capitalism while asking for funding in making your art and then attack people because they demanded the product they paid for.
It is not everyday you get to witness a breakdown in text form. Read the whole thing if you want. The comments below are more entertaining than the posting of his “rant”. (I know, rant is an evil word now.)
If I had a crowd-funded project, I would do everything in my power to see it come to completion and get the product out there. I shouldn't say this, but here's hoping a lot of people now download a copy of the book for free. 
 That's the sight and smell of 50k burning...

Friday, March 07, 2014

Ken Griffey Jr. awkward interview

Ken Griffey Jr. awkward interview
One word answers and awkward pauses, someone doesn't want to be there. I like how the ESPN ancor knew something was wrong and shifted toward ending the interview early. She has that expression of “WTF, dude?” Her name is Linda Cohn and she tried her damnedest to get him to open up.
Not even a smile until the end.
Why was he so pissed, given that Upper Deck was paying him for his appearances?
Maybe he is mad they're not making anymore of his videogames?
Griffey Jr. did apologize for his behavior toward Linda. From his Instagram, ((I want to apologize to Linda for the way things went today. I was in the middle of a cough attack and felt a little ill and didn't want to walk off the set. Linda has always been professional to me and my family .  I'm sorry, Junior @espn @sportcenter @lindacohn ))
Chalk it up to a bad day.

Ukraine/Russian standoff

This video sums up the whole Ukraine/Russian standoff nicely
Yeah, Stalin pretty much f'ed it up for most of that region didn't he? Both views are true at the end of the video. It is good to see why we're in this issue to begin with. I do think Putin is in the wrong, mainly because he's taken a hard line on most things of late. Remember the whole gay controversy?
BTW, here's another Pussy Riot attack video.
 
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